Rambling

Today has been a good day. I was able to sleep until 8 o'clock, watch a little morning news, drink my coffee, and spend several hours studying. I also pretty much finished my paper, so I feel pretty accomplished right now. The last few hours I have been trying to get back into the zone with studying, but it doesn't seem to be working so well anymore. Well, I don't feel too stressed because midterms are still two weeks away, and I already have a good amount of studying under my belt as a foundation. I will try to keep up with it every day. *Try being the key word. :)

Lately I have begun to feel like I'm really staring to get this stuff. Not completely, and I suppose that I'll never arrive there (who ever does?), but I just feel like things are starting to click. Especially meds. When we took patho/pharm last semester, half the time I felt like things were going over my head and I wasn't getting it. Now I realize that class was the foundation I needed, because I'm actually drawing from what I learned, and remembering more and more as I see different patients, or study for adult health. I see diagnoses and what meds they are on and a little lightbulb appears over my head. :) Assessing patients is still a little shaky, but that's why they still have us in school now, isn't it? I'm learning. Praise God, I'm learning!

I will be glad October 20th is here. After that, all of my midterms will be over and I will be well into the second half. I just pray that I pass. People always say, "Failing is never an option!" Well it's not an option but it sure is a possibility. You just have to face reality. Although I know that God has a plan and nothing I do will thwart it, that doesn't take away the personal responsibility of working hard and doing my best, as to the LORD. I think that sometimes as Christians we sort of have the "let go and let God" (I've never really understood what that means) mentality and don't want to take personal responsibility. We use God's sovereignty as an excuse to be lazy. Wow, that sounds horrible even to write it out but I think that I do it all the time. I say, God has a plan and even if I do this or don't do that, it'll happen anyway. I don't want to take responsibility. I do that all the time.

Do I work hard because I want to get good grades? Or do I work hard because I want to glorify God? I have to ask myself those questions. And when I'm slacking off and not doing my best (which happens more often than I'd like to admit), it is simply because I'm lazy, I am not working to glorify God, and I'm selfish.

The weather has been simply glorious the past two weeks- I have woken up to temperatures in the low 60's (even hit 59 Friday morning!) and the day never gets much above the 70's. I have never seen this in September/October. Maybe it's global warming.