A year ago yesterday my Grandpa went into the hospital. Hard to believe all that can change in a year. He died on December 4, and less than 100 days later my Grandma joined him after a painful struggle.

This morning as I was driving home from work, my mind continued to wander back to those days. They were really hard. Some of the most difficult, emotional, and painful days.

I'm still looking forward to Christmas this year. I found out that I am off Christmas night until the 30th. I couldn't be happier, because it means I will get to join family. It will be our first Christmas without both Grandma and Grandpa. It will be difficult, yes. Christmas was one of the four times a year that we got to see our grandparents. Our family would be with them for the whole week preceding it, and those were always such wonderful, wonderful days. Thoughts of my grandparents will always be on the forefront at Christmastime.

There is a melancholy happiness in me today. Things that once were but are no more. Yet they are always mine. People grow old and pass on. Relationships can change and be lost. Circumstances change. But I'll always have the memories. I spoke with my friend, Lindsey last week about this. We were almost in tears at the thought (In our defense, Hogwarts hymn was playing at the same time- how can you not feel sad?).

Today I ask for prayers for my cousin Jonathan. I've not wanted to impose on the privacy of my Aunt and Uncle and cousins and so chosen not to speak of it before now. Thankfully he has greatly improved, but he is still very, very sick.