I have heard people talk about day-after-Christmas depression, but never really experienced it. However, today I have been experiencing it for the first time. Waking up after spending two nights at the Kerchers' (which was a blast, and I'll tell you all about it), getting in the car to find that the Christmas station has resumed its usual boring music broadcast, getting coffee at Starbucks in a red cup knowing that Christmas is over. I've never really felt this way on December 26. Usually I would be driving to my other grandparents' house, looking forward to party #2 complete with gift exchanges, chili contests, and eating fluff and drinking apple punch. But that's not now, and I need to accept this today for what it is.

I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas night at the Kerchers'. It was actually really exciting, because I have never had Christmas morning stockings before. We all got into our stockings first thing in the morning (and Mrs. Kercher goes all out with stockings), followed by a delicious Christmas breakfast made by Mrs. Kercher. After cleaning up the kitchen we sat around the tree for an hour opening presents. It was so much fun, and really just like being with family. The Warrens joined us for lunch, and we ended the day decorating gingerbread houses and watching Elf. It was a great day, and I couldn't have asked for more if I couldn't be with my family. The Kerchers have grown to be my second family over the years. Mrs. Kercher is my second mother, Mr. Kercher my second dad.

I watched Julie and Julia today, and it was very cute. I did some google research however and found that Julia Child actually was very unimpressed with the real Julie (and so am I after what I read about her)- and the movie itself even addresses this. While I'm on the subject, Julia Child was a very interesting person. She was not allowed into the Navy or the Women's Army Corps because she was too tall- 6'2''. So she joined the OSS- Office of Strategic Services as something like a spy. She didn't get married until she was 34, and did not even begin her career as a French cook until her 40s. Which goes to show that not everyone finds their niche (or their husband for that matter) early in life. She has a pretty neat story I think, not to mention I feel a little connection with her being a tall woman myself. The best part of the movie is when it shows her and her sister running to meet each other in Paris, and they are contrasted by all the short people around them. It made me laugh because sometimes I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb in crowds.

Loneliness has been somewhat the name of the game this week, though not entirely since I did have an awesome Christmas. Some things that have helped ease the loneliness: hanging out with Allison and Sarah, the Kerchers (of course!), watching the Office, Lord of the Rings soundtracks, and Ben and Jerry's: Steven Colbert's Americone Dream. I now have the next few days of work ahead of me, and the busyness of that will keep my mind off things as well.

And so, yes, today is a bit of a depressing day. It occurred to me the other day sitting in Starbucks as I was feeling very sorry for myself, that everyone has felt this way at some point in their lives. Did I think that being out of school, or having a job, or having more friends, or simply being a "grown up" didn't come with it all- happiness, sadness, joy, elation, depression, anger, sadness, community-ness (is that a word- or emotion? I just made it one), loneliness, and sometimes all of these emotions mixed up together? I seem to have had this false perception that perhaps something was wrong with me that I've been feeling this way lately-- and not just the last few weeks, but months as well. I have probably watched too much Disney and way too many chick flicks. I'm sure that even after Cinderella found Prince Charming, she still had PMS. Anyway, I digress. I think I'm just learning that life is very complicated, never the same, always varying, not always good, and very ordinary.

Anyways, I'm writing everything as I think of it and I need to stop.