I'm not a fan of resolutions, however, after reading Real Simple today I came up with what may qualify as one. Though I still don't like to call it that. An article in this month's magazine spoke about "rumination," which is basically recalling moments of the past, over-analyzing them, wondering if that's why you are the way you are, etc...

Rumination is said to be closely linked to depression.

I realized how much I do this, some of which has been influenced by those close to me, but that it is a real problem in my life (one that can be anxiety-inducing and--yes, depression-inducing if I'm not careful). In relation to my last couple of posts, I'm learning to acknowledge those things, but to look at myself right now; to take ownership of who I am and not blame.

Call it a New Year's resolution if you will, however it is simply a resolution in relation to current circumstances and in taking care of myself to keep away from a path I do not want to follow. In several ways, I have felt I am at a crossroads in life these past months, and I know the one I do not want to choose.

Another thing, influenced by Real Simple, is I am resolving to nix the negativity. Especially when it comes to facebook and how I project myself, but I figure I should probably practice that in life as well. We'll see how it goes, though please don't expect perfection out of it. My sister recently pointed out to me that one of her friends, also a nurse (though arguably in a less stressful field), told her that I complain too much on facebook. I was kind of ticked off, and still am, but decided that to a degree, she was right. I realize that people can't take comments and statuses in the context that I am writing them, and how it truly could sound extremely negative. And that the negative comments stand out above many of my other more positive, upbeat status updates.

I am proud to say that I am home from vacation, having worked two nights so far, and am not sick. It seems whenever I travel, (especially to a colder climate) I am prone to get sick when I come home. Even being around a few little snotty noses up north, I was able to avoid it. Hurrah! And I did NOT get my flu shot (though I may have already had the flu in October).

Happy New Year!