I am one of those people who is not a fan of "Christian cliches," (and by that I'm talking about the commonly used spiritual phrases we use without even meaning it) although I use them myself at times. When I am among a group of Christians and phrases like "Praise the Lord" and "God is good" and "The Lord will provide" are thrown around in conversation, almost meaninglessly at times, I get frustrated.

I recently heard somebody say, very sincerely, that they want people to see Jesus Christ as their only source of joy. Initially I felt somewhat smug when she said that. I thought to myself, "How in the world do you prove to me that Christ is your ultimate source of joy- you have everything! A great personality, a fiance, you're beautiful, etc..." (and a disclaimer... almost everyone I know is engaged, so this does not automatically narrow down who this friend was, as this is not intended to be gossip). Until I realized, is Christ really MY ultimate source of joy? How do we show people that? Is joy only an outward sign of happiness? Is it pasting a smile on your face, pretending to be happy when you're not? What is it?

In America (or anywhere really for that matter), how do we show people that Christ is our life? How do we show them that He is enough? How are people going to believe us, when we have just as much materially as the rest of them- nice cars, a nice house, ipods, TV's, designer clothes, etc... I could go on and on with that list. There is a video on youtube by John Piper, and in it he says that never will you hear somebody say "Christ is enough because I drive a BMW!" How do we really show that Christ is enough, when seemingly our lives are perfect because of what we have? Yes, there are people with all of those things that are inwardly suffering, but really, how do we look any different than the rest of the world.

This is not a bashing of material items or of wealth. I feel torn because I do look forward to the day I can live in a nice house of my own, drive a nice car, etc... And yet I know that those will be my source of happiness.

What makes me the most angry in life? I get mad when you take away my comforts. Someone finished the last soda in the fridge- I practically throw a fit. I get grouchy when I don't have enough money to spend when I'm out shopping. When I look in the mirror and don't see the perfect body, then I get really mad and think life is unfair. A great example- recently this week I thought my computer had broken, and I honestly convinced myself that day just couldn't get any worse. Because of my computer.

Christ is not my ultimate source of joy. I have proven it by my attitude every single day. No, if I am honest with myself and with others, my joy comes from the people around me and from the things that I have. I'm not happy when the bank account is low. I'm angry when the scale goes up a few pounds. I don't get my few hours to relax in a day, and I'm grumpy. Nope, I think I have proven to those around me (and most of all to myself) that my source of joy is in worldly things.

So where do we draw the line? When is enough enough? Is it wrong therefore to have a lot of possessions? I don't know. David was a rich king, yet we always call him the "man after God's own heart." Abraham was God's friend, but he had much wealth. But how did these men find that "balance?" How do you have many worldly possessions and not cling to them tightly like I do? Jesus even said that it was "easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God" (Mark 10:24). If I were that rich young ruler, would I have responded in the same way? We often read that verse and rationalize that Jesus really just meant that man had to follow Him first, yet that man was still refusing to sell his possessions for Christ! I would have done the same thing! What does that say about the condition of my heart right now?

I used to read that passage, and would wonder why in the world that man did not want to follow Jesus. All he had to do was sell his possessions! "At this the man's face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth" (10:22). Yet, I think that if Christ were to come to me today and command me to do the same, the same would possibly be said of me. I love my worldly possession. I love to have fun. I love to be ambitious and dream of the future. Not that these things are wrong in and of themselves, but I put them above Christ. They are my idols.

Any insight would be appreciated.